Topic 167: On Being Misunderstood

Carol:

            Let Me Make One Thing Perfectly Clear

I wouldn’t want anyone to misunderstand daily theme essays 163 and 166 about getting a speeding ticket, ignoring the paperwork, and putting off taking the driver’s ed course. After the process server showed up Tuesday night, I cleared yesterday’s busy retirement calendar completed the online course. I am now a success graduate of the A_________Driver’s University. I have a degree in online driver’s training.
 

I felt pretty good about it too. I think my retention rate is pretty high after plowing through the material in 4 hours without taking a break (mental retention, not bladder retention—please!).  For instance, I can remember almost every single embedded factoid used as a “verification check” that I wasn’t just skimming the material or skipping sections. Did you know that the kid who designed the “swoosh” logo for Nike only got paid $35.00? Or that the New Year’s Eve falling ball from New York City is made of Waterford crystal?
 

Not, that I didn’t learn some driving facts, too.  As we were driving into town for dinner last night-- because I was too tired to cook from the mental/physical overload of finishing the online class and Megan was too tired from her shopping trip to replace the dresses Bell had shredded with her tiny little teeth-- I pointed out to Marc that the wet road we were on is most dangerous just after it starts raining because the rain mixes with the road oil. And,  when he did what is known as a “California stop” at the corner of our road, I pointed out that he had not followed Arizona statutes for length of stop and distance from corner. He must have misunderstood my intention because he was grumpy about that. “We don’t need no stinkin’ backseat drivers!”
 

Thursday mornings are always tough for essay writing  because the neighbors come for coffee, which means my usual  5-7 a.m. writing time is taken up cleaning several days’ worth of accumulation of newspapers, unwashed dishes,  counter stains, etc. Although Marc usually takes care of making the coffee and washing the big stuff that won’t fit in the dishwasher, I asked him to vacuum the living-room instead. And a good thing he did. When he moved the washstand cum mail center in our front hall, he found an envelope wedged underneath. He brought me the envelope because he didn’t have his reading glasses although he could make out that it was from the Prescott Valley Magistrate Court.
 

It turned out to be addressed to Marc, not me. He pulled several sheets of paper out of the envelope and handed them to me. And, there it was, another photo from the exact same intersection where I and our other two dog-walking friends had received their photo-radar generated speeding tickets. He grabbed the paper. “Does it look like me?” Not only was Marc’ his photo was just as crystal clear as mine had been, but he was even driving the same vehicle. 

Please don’t misunderstand me. I’m not complaining here that the town to our east with all the speed cameras has a racket going just because 4 out of 5 of us dog-walkers got a ticket in the last two months at the same intersection (where the speed drops from 45 mph to 35 mph). After all, my online driver’s education class taught me that being a good driver means being a careful driver, remaining ever vigilant for hazardous road conditions, traffic obstacles, changing speed zones and…. the camera’s evil eye!

Megan:

 (but not too sore for cartoons)