Topic 98: Human Parasites

Carol:

Megan:

I have come across several first-time pregnant women who referred to their unborn child as a parasite. It seems to be a way of whistling in the dark. In college, a classmate gave birth to a baby boy the spring semester of our senior year. I remember sitting next to her at a college function when she was heavily pregnant, watching her stomach bulge out in random sharp jabs where the baby was kicking. She would hiss, and rub her belly and tell the child to go back to sleep. It was sort of amazing to watch. Later, just before graduation I sat with her on the steps in front of Café Susie’s while she changed his diaper. She cooed to him and wiggled his legs and said, “Boy, you and I haven’t spent one moment apart in 3 months. I think we have a codependent relationship.”

I think what my friend was just beginning to realize is something that expectant parents must not yet understand – that the parasitic relationship will continue for at least the next 18 years, or if you’re really unlucky, the next 30. Books have been written about this topic  -- about adult children living at home for indefinite periods of time.  New York Life refers to the phenomena of  “Boomerang Kids” – I guess because you sent them out, but they came flying back again. I of course, do not have any children of my own, but I have plenty of experience being the kids who comes back again.

The past 7 months have been the longest amount of time I’ve lived with my parents since I “left home” at 18 to go to college. We’re all relieved it’s turned out so well, but maybe if I wasn’t so comfortable I wouldn’t still be here (just kidding, mom!). I try not to think of our relationship as parasitic so much as symbiotic. I do a lot of cooking, most of the grocery shopping and nearly all of the driving. I’m inconsistent about cleaning, but that’s a trait that runs in the family.  I have also taken over kid-duty when my cousin needs someone to watch her children. These things all contribute to the well-being of the household and maybe the conveniences balances out the financial burdens.

Today both the parents are sick and staying home. I am torn between looking up a  chicken soup recipe, or taking off for the day to enjoy my health before I inevitably come down with the same illness.  Ok, I’m actually not that torn.